Tweens will love it!

Today I got an urge to listen to something cool and fresh, so I grabbed my notebook PC and visited Hannah Montana's website via Disney Channel. They didn't have any music, but I did spot an ad for "Tween Fashion". I thought it was a joke, but I noticed a Target URL. Friends, I kid you not: Target has a 22 page E-catalog for tweens-- you know, those munchkins who can't quite fill Juniors styles but are too cool to be seen in Kids. It's a good move. Tweens have money from babysitting, and they need clothes as well. Everyone wins.

It's all good until you see the teeth shining like sharpened steel in the dark, and then NICHE MARKETING EATS YOUR CHILDREN. That's right: marketers know more about us than Big Brother and Karl Rove combined, and once they find you, they'll consume you and your tweens whole, spitting the bones into the corner in a small altar of human byproducts. So, thanks, Target. I'm simultaneously appalled and impressed. That's a feat almost greater than the development of your entire Tween product line.

Absurdity and my everpresent melodrama aside, niche marketing is the next phase in the war for your paycheck. Check out the book Microtrends by marketing guru Mark Penn. Penn was the guy who discovered "soccer moms" for Clinton in 1996. The book is soft-science at best, leaning heavily on conjecture but still relying on solid numbers to form the backbone of the work. New marketing means taking judicious chances, so no one's canonizing this one yet.

I've listened to the Hannah Montana song "Nobody's Perfect" four times during the composition of this blog, just to see what happens. I've remained outwardly compliant, yet I can feel the anger growing inside me. As well, my head is beginning to throb.

Heated

In a few weeks time, Minnesota explodes to life. The cold tundra melts and blooms into a warm garden. Flowers poke through the frost, giving way to grass shoots and tree buds. The entire landscape makes such a quick transition, it's hard not to miss!

I too have made a short transition into summer life. It seems like yesterday that I was wearing a down jacket and heavy boots. Now, the A/C runs almost continuously, an artificial cool pocket in a balmy atmosphere.

I know I need to change as well. I had a long talk with an old friend the other night, and he is doing much better than me spiritually. He says he is "positioning [himself] for success", and that makes a heckuva lot of sense to me. In the scheme of life, your friends and habits translate into your outcome.

In fact, people rely on me to be a better person, now-- not tomorrow, next week or in the coming summer months. This is where I say good night and God bless.

Ecstacy

I've stayed up all night jacked up on e-media. Several times, I have reduced myself to tears. Anything can set me off: a photo, a comment on my site or perhaps a funny music video. I strained my chest laughing, and my eyes are looking rather red. This is my broadband existence in manic mode. LOL LOL LOL LOL!

Last·FM rules!

32 are gone forever: a prayer for the Hokies

Arabic speakers have a saying that translates to "They gave us their years" --so we might continue to live. Thank you, friends. God rest your souls.
For the surviving: May peace quiet their darkest tremors, and may hope burn away the fog of fear. May shock be changed to sadness, and may sadness become healing. Never shall we forget. Amen.

Top 10: You know it's spring when you're out jogging and . . .

10) Suddenly, you feel hot, white and red all over. Caucasian pale monster! Run!
9) Your panting sounds worse than usual. It must be the sedentary months you spent in your snow cave.
8) The sand is not reminiscent of Siberian Beachfest '04. It gives.
7) Critters!
6) You take off your shirt, and your nipples remain soft and comfortable. Yeah, I said that.
5) A pickup truck full of Mexican roofers almost runs you off the road.
4) You remember there's no way you should be out with finals week so near.
3) Screw the finals! It's sunny today!
2) Insatiable thirst! Why am I so thirsty? What's going on? *Thud*
1) Welcome to Stankonia. The air is blooming with odors of moist foliage and thawing animal feces. Yum! Let's do another mile!

Fun with open-source

I've spent the whole day messing with Gimp 2 and Scribus, and I'm having a ton of fun! It took me an hour and a half to figure out how to export a .bmp from Scribus, but I'm learning! On the left is my new Facebook pic. The text was hard to get right!

Timberlake babysits the Nick-tots at the 20th Annual Kids' Choice Awards

Justin was a great presenter, a real class act, but he just doesn't fit the bill. What happened to 'sexy back'? I'll show my hand here as a fuddy-duddy, but Justin Timberlake, from a marketing standpoint, shouldn't come within ten stations of Nickelodeon. Even though he didn't perform, it's just not appropriate. Wait until they're 14 to book JT so they digest the MTV ethos a little easier. When they're 20, they might think for themselves, but that's too late.

My competence is unmatched!

Ideally, to master Arabic you should study 4-5 hours per day for several years. I study about an hour a week. For our Friday quiz, the teacher gave us a word bank with nouns, verbs and other words and told us to write our own sentences. That was a big problem great idea. I showed my mastery by writing sentences such as, "Mes'ali 'annini min el-'ahil" (The matter is the bottle from the family) and "Nayyamat el-walad baladak" (You put to sleep the boys from your country" and finally "biddi el-'ibri!" (I don't want the needle!). I'm not saying I want an F on this quiz; I'm just saying I could do a lot of damage if I ever try to talk with the locals.

Guatemala stymies U.S. offensive to keep the tie in Texas

In a friendly match under warm Frisco, Texas skies, the United States could not pierce the net of their Gold Cup 2007 opponent, ending the game tied at zero. The young U.S. team should have won this one, and they knew it, ending the game visibly frustrated. Although they played competent defense, their strikers seemed confused at times, kicking late or early, high or low. The U.S. has never lost to Guatemala on U.S. soil. Since the teams' second meeting in 1988, their record now stands at 9-0-5. The U.S. will need a stronger performance to win in the Gold Cup.

This is the first post.

I imagine this blog is going to look a lot like a sports page, but I always will add a few surprises. My favorite sport is racing, so I'll let this photo of Indy driver Danica Patrick start the party. It's easy to root for Danica, and I hope it's just as easy to be a fan of this blog. I'm always full of ideas, so check back for updates! By the way, Danica is currently #10/20 drivers.