gRAMMAR wARS

THE ALLCAPS CLUB WERE A BRASH AND ICONIC INTRUSION INTO THE LIVES OF THE VENERABLE Proper Puncs AND THE RUTHLESS lowercase family.

WE FLEW SO HIGH, BUT WE WENT TOO FAR, TOO LOUD.

WE SHOUTED OUR WAY INTO OBLIVION, LIKE THE MILKMAN, OR COOKING WITH LARD, OR DRESSING TO THE NINES FOR A HOP ACROSS THE ATLANTIC.

A FAILED EXPERIMENT IN NONCONFORMITY, WE'RE REFORMED NOW, BUT EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, WE STILL CAP.

Doogie really was a genius

It's after 0200, and by 0800 I've got copy due for a website redesign. I'm taking a break from my fun to share a productivity hack I discovered in the grind of journalism school, where writing and editing well, at strange hours, with little or no sleep, was kind of a big deal.

Disclaimer: Yes, I ripped this off Doogie. Yes, it does work.

Step #1: Change your background color! It cuts down on eye fatigue, and it's retro enough to give your right brain a good massaging. If you ever struggle with "creativity-on-demand," you must try this.

Step #2: You'll have to invert your font color for easier reading. Fan that I am of preteen physician phenoms, I prefer Doogie's white/blue combo. Also, blue is a soothing color, and the white page can a psychological hurdle.

Step #3: Before you print, don't forget to revert to white screen and black text!

Andy
Copy slave trying to stay on deadline
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Ecumenism is not a dirty word

Why the first few moments in heaven may be awkward silence ...

More to come ...

Who's on trial here?

This blog was supposed to be another counterattack against stupidity; instead, it is an admission that, if not for the grace of God, I would be living in my own, personally-selected version of utter stupidity.

God forgive me for my sense of entitlement. I have been forgiven for so much. Please take all of my heart, and teach me your ways.

How did I get here?

Read this ...

Because every fire breathing robot deserves its own soundtrack ...

Because every fire-breathing robot deserves its own soundtrack, here's One Month Off (Filthy Dukes Remix) by Bloc Party. Kele and the boys from Bloc Party played First Ave on Monday. Yep, this is the same band Noel Gallagher said sounded like a "band off University Challenge."

"A 7.2-meter (23.6 foot) tall aluminum made robot 'Giant Torayan' blows fire into the air during a rehearsal of the 'Roppongi Art Night' special art event at Roppongi Hills in Tokyo, Japan, Friday, March 27, 2009. The robot, created by Japanese artist Kenji Yanobe, is one of main art installations for the event that aims to transform the entire area of Roppongi for one night from Saturday, March 28 to Sunday with art of all types under the theme of 'Encounters.' (AP Photo/Katsumi Kasahara)"

Words gone awry

I've been thinking about this, and at the risk of sounding like a complete moron, I'd like to share it with you:

How do you feel about reclaiming the semantic nuances of the Christian faith? First matter of agenda: "We're going to church" should be replaced with something that bears even a minute resemblance to what a "church" actually is. Remove indefinite article "a" and replace with "the", and capitalize said object in most instances, because individual streams or expressions can barely comprise an such an ancient and venerable network of bodies.

Progressive pastor here in the Cities calls his Sunday services "seminars". Get my drift?

Am I way out of line here?

Power Distance (A primer for passion)

Social media are shrinking to new lows the power distance-- the extent to which the less powerful members of institutions and organizations expect and accept that power is distributed unequally.

Examples:

• Both the Pope and the President of the United States have YouTube pages.
• Doritos allows user-submitted content to appear as a Super Bowl commercial.
• My local newspaper features user comments as high as the byline.
• Mothers angry about a Motrin campaign Tweeted the ads right off the air.
• You can read the Bible in any language-- free online.
  

I can hear the Schoolhouse Rock song as I write: "The shot heard around the world was the start of the revolution."

Power distance is low . . . time to respond!

How, you ask?

1. Get your cause right.
2. Figure out who wants to hear it.
3. Fire.
4. Aim.
5. Fire again.

If you hit something, you'll know. People are naturally passionate; even apathy is a passion, ya know . . . your job is to find out where their passion lies and how to harness it in practical ways.

CAUTION: Using the old rules of broadcast media do not work with social media-- a noted cult of generosity. To get, ya gotta give. A lot. This is what we call "value-based offerings."

I have noticed the Facebook chatter begin to build as:
1) More users join. Opening the "Book" to non-university students catapulted FB into a clear #1.
2) Applications add functionality.
3) Causes mobilize the bourgeois to movement.

How do you cut through the clutter? Give! Recognize people are naturally selfish, and give them what they want.

That's all for today. Shalom, my revolutionary brethren.